In this post I talk about the choice to be happy but I understand that those suffering with their mental health can’t just choose to pick themselves up and ‘get over it’. I’ve been there and it’s just not something you have any control over. But on your good days, take a leap of good faith and try to let go.

I always used to feel like I was at the mercy of my emotions. I felt controlled by the way I felt about things that I had no control over.

I also felt unlucky. I felt like bad things happened to me and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. Which is true, I had no control over the bad things that happened in my life but what I could choose was how I acted in response to these things and the number of negative possibilities I brought into my life.

But now, I have made a decision. I have decided to be happy.

We cannot control the external forces in our life but what we can choose is how we perceive them.

We can let life make us angry and resilient and stubborn or we can take each day as it comes, we can stop ourselves from judging all future situations like past ones, we can stop making assumptions and we can let life soften us instead.

Life throwing shit at you can really turn you into a horrible person. It can make you feel like the world is out to get you. It can force you into putting your barriers up and trying to wear a hard exterior so nobody can know you enough to hurt you. But what’s the purpose of that?

Why live your life being fearful and angry and hurt by things you can just let go of?

Whenever you find yourself feeling negative, ask yourself what purpose the feeling has. Ask if feeling worried, frustrated, angry or upset about something is going to make a single bit of difference to the situation itself. If it doesn’t then do your absolute best to let go.

I’m not saying it’s easy by any means. Letting go can be one of the most difficult struggles however we often actively hold on to feelings of regret and anger that serve no purpose in our lives.

Sometimes it’s easier to believe that the worst outcome is the most likely outcome and that can act as a barrier so we feel happy when the outcome is anything else. I used to stop myself from trying to avoid failure and this is similar but it holds you back so so much. I am now a firm believer in positive thinking so I weigh up all outcomes and prepare for both the best and the worst. I also try my hardest knowing that if I fail that at least I tried.

So if you need a boost in morale right now or if you’re feeling a little down, try making the choice to be happy by taking these simple steps…

– Show gratitude for the positives in your life

– Eliminate the negatives, or the possibilities for

– Prepare for the worst

– React in a way that is purposeful and intentional

– Let go of the past



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all photos by Rebecca Claire, (Sony Xperia X, edited with VSCO) // all rights reserved



  1. Yes! Firstly I love the disclaimer, explanation bit at the start because so often people tell folks with depression they just have to choose to be happy but obviously this isn’t that.

    You are so right that we have the power to control how we react to things. Maybe not always but some of the time.

    I wrote a twitter thread about this today actually. I was out wearing a crop top and a woman stared at my belly. Rather than being hurt/offended/angry I approached it with empathy. Maybe she’s envious of my confidence, maybe she struggles with her own weight/body image and is projecting that on to me. Most of the time how others treat us has nothing to do with us or what we’ve done. It’s the same with life events.
    All we can do is keep keeping on.

    V ❤


  2. Absolutely love this post! People with genuine mental health struggles aside, making a conscious decision to be happy and take a positive approach can be hugely beneficial. I became a positive person at the age of about 19 after realising that unnecessary drama and self pity was not going to do me any favours and I’ve never looked back! So many things in life come down to perspective. Breaking the cycle can be hard but it’s so worth it x


    1. The proof is in the pudding really; you’re a prime example of someone who leads a very fulfilling and happy lifestyle and I’m sure a lot of that is down to your outlook on things :) xx


  3. I used to feel very negative all the time because of a particular girl on my university course. She would constantly complain, and always had a negative retort for everything, and it bothered me. I always used to go on huge rants too which left me feeling pretty pumped up but shitty. I’ve also made a conscious effort recently to let more things roll off my back, and to not complain if the only thing it’s going to do is make me feel even more shitty about the situation! Great post, again, Rebecca! ❤


  4. You know, even as someone with depression I fully believe we can chose to be happy. It’s not an easy task, like you say it’s not as easier as just decide ding to get over it and be happy but working every day to change your mindset, self care, take your medication if you need it, and you make little steps each day to be happy.
    Have you read the life changing magic of not giving. Fuck? That helps too haha


  5. Fab blog post and some great tips. I definitely need to learn to get rid of people/things that are putting a negative effect upon my life and just be a little more positive 🙂 x


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